Shows how vague feedback kills growth and gives a concrete OFNR framework plus real-world antipattern examples to make redirecting feedback actionable.
Effective feedback is only useful when it is targeted, actionable, and follows a simple structure. The piece argues that most feedback fails because it is untargeted or focuses on things the receiver cannot influence, and introduces the Observation-Feeling-Need-Request (OFNR) model as a practical alternative. It shows why vague or overly positive feedback leaves teams stuck. The article walks through six common antipatterns with concrete examples from a fictional "wifi-enabled toaster" project: untargeted feedback that blames the team without naming a person, feedback about features no engineer can affect, only pointing out what wasn't done, non-specific criticism, giving positives without any negatives, and the classic feedback sandwich that dilutes the message. Each example demonstrates how the lack of specificity or relevance makes the feedback ineffective. To fix these issues it recommends starting with the OFNR template, pairing positive reinforcement with actionable redirecting points, writing feedback down, avoiding public delivery unless safe, and openly acknowledging one's own learning curve. By adopting this disciplined approach leaders can turn feedback into a growth tool rather than a source of frustration.
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